Rings (2017)

“You’re here about the girl, The girl in the well”

I remember when the phrase “seven days” literally frightened me. I had to put a blanked over my television in my bedroom the night I saw The Ring (2002). Even years later, when I would be switching cables around on my TV and snow static would pop up, I would instantly imagine Samara climbing through the screen. The Ring did for VCR’s what Jaws did for the ocean. I was desperately hoping I would get the same feeling from Rings. Unfortunately, I was sorely disappointed.rings

What gets me is the fact that there really was nothing terrifying about this movie. Sure there were plenty of jump scares, but nothing with real substance. I’m sorry, but turning up the sound effects when a bird hits a window, while startling, is not scary! Did I feel ripped off by the end? I would have to say yes. Not even the aftermath shots of Samara’s victims was as creepy as it seemed in the original. This film had so much potential. The opening scene on the airplane was great! I sat back with a sigh of relief when the well footage began appearing on everyone’s in flight entertainment screen. Let’s just say the movie went down with the plane.

Okay, i’ll try to not give too many spoilers. I guess keep reading this paragraph at your own risk. Julia (Matilda Lutz) and her boyfriend Holt (Alex Roe) are forced into a long distance relationship when Holt goes off to college. Some time goes by, and Holt completely drops off the face of the earth. Julia gets concerned and goes on the hunt for her boyfriend. After snooping around Holt’s dorm room, and stalking his professor, she gets in over her head with some weird club that watches the cursed VHS tape, and then before their seven days are up (you die seven days after you watch the tape), they get somebody else to watch it (having somebody else watch the tape moves the curse from you to them), all in the name of, science? Yes, that is what I said. Science. The technology used to peel apart the tape, and draw alternate conclusions to why maybe Samara isn’t as bad as we have all thought she was is a little anticlimactic. So you spend most of the movie with Julia and Holt trying to put Samara’s bones to rest, and then in the last two minutes of the film, they come out with a “re-birthing” twist of Samara, and let me tell you- it is dumb.

If you haven’t seen The Ring, watch it, but don’t bother with the sequels. I own The Ring Two, but honestly I can’t recall anything about it. It’s not very memorable. However, I’m still holding out hope for the franchise. Maybe someone else can redeem Samara to her former glory as one of the creepiest spirits we’ve witnessed in horror film history.

 

 

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